www – week 6

First a few thoughts:

  1. This week I was really appreciating my health. Sure, I struggle with my weight, but I have been blessed with amazing health. I mean, I get sick from time to time, but in general, I am a very healthy person. Even with the extra weight, I can run and exercise and I have full function of all of me. Such a blessing!
  2. Losing weight the slow way takes a lot of restraint and discipline. You would think it would be the opposite, but really, not eating is easy. Eating moderately and healthfully is a totally different ball game. But I think I’m catching on. So far, so good.
  3. If it is at all within your power to start a lunch group, and people want to be healthy, I highly recommend it. Today’s salad was a delicious Greek Spinach Salad. It was fantastic.
  4. While the process is slow, it is paying off. I went upstairs today for a meeting and Amanda, who had been on vacation for 11 days, asked me how much weight I had lost since she’d been gone. Well, as you all know, I didn’t lose any weight last week and actually gained a little, which is what I told her (although, I guess if you take the sum of the last two weeks, I had lost a little). Her response was that when she saw me it was like one of those moments where you haven’t seen someone in a long time and they just look really good. How flattering is that?!
  5. Sharing this goal with everyone around me, but especially on the blog, was a great idea; an idea I stole from another blogger. I love having a forum in which I can talk (write) freely about my successes and my obstacles, without feeling like I’m forcing someone to listen to my stories. Blogging about this whole process is probably one of the major components of my success thus far.
  6. While, sometimes it’s hard to make an inconvenient, but healthy choice when there are so many convenient, but unhealthy choices, I do love healthy food and I am grateful for that. I have always been a veggie fan and I love brown rice, but this week I got hooked on whole wheat pasta (Archer Farms, specifically…love Target) and multi grain tortillas. Absolutely delicious! And I’m learning that if I can make healthy food convenient, I’ve got it made.
  7. Another major break through…I used to hesitate when posting (or sharing) pictures that involved me and food, whether it was a scoop ice cream or a slice of an apple. I would do it occasionally, but not without serious reflection. I used to always think about what people would think when they saw a picture of me eating. I finally came to the realization that a) most people aren’t thinking about anything other than how much they wish they had that ice cream cone and b) I just don’t care anymore. I know what’s going on in my life and I feel good and that’s what matters. And, well, I love food. Big deal. So do millions of skinny people.
  8. Losing weight scares me. I know that may sound strange, but think about this with me. I know how to be chubby Chloe. I have been chubby Chloe since I was ten. I don’t know how to be anything but that. Well, I was non-chubby, anorexic, laxative popping, exercise addict Chloe for a while, but that’s not something I ever got comfortable with (thank Heaven, really and truly). Even writing this, I can feel a little bit of anxiety starting to build. Losing weight means losing a part my identity…it is new territory. And, as I learned from one very unhealthy relationship, no matter how much I know, intellectually, that the new situation will be better, it is very, very hard to let go of the one that’s familiar, the one I have learned to handle.
  9. Going along with #7, I think part of the success behind slower weight loss is not just that your body has time to adjust and be healthy, but so does your mind. I could be totally wrong, but doesn’t that seem to make sense?

And now onto the weigh-in. After last week’s little set back I did get back on track. There was no beating myself up; there was no self-loathing; just a sense of accomplishment for what I had already done and a renewed commitment to myself.

This week, I lost an even 3 lbs for a grand total of 15.2 lbs. I am right on track…in fact a little ahead, averaging a little over 2 lbs per week. At this rate, I will be 24 lbs lighter when I run the SGM in October, and that is a happy, happy thought! Every pound I lose will reduce my time and the pressure on my joints. My knees are thanking me already.

9 thoughts on “www – week 6

  1. Thanks for the comments.k – Kay to go! That’s huge. You have got to be close to where you want to be! Did you actually rejoin?cropstar – cliche, yes, but it’s still nice to hear. and really, perception is the hardest part.jenny – the feeling is totally mutual, as I’ve said before. I love your posts. Holly – We are going to have to run together one of these days. Maybe I’ll look at what runs there are in Houston. And yes…I have noticed a difference on my runs. When I first started back up, I was very aware of my body because I could feel parts bounce that shouldn’t have been bouncing. How’s that for honesty. Now, everything is tightening up and less weight has definitely increased my speed.terri – thanks for commenting. Congratulations on your goal and staying at it for six months. I will definitely be interested in hearing how you made it through this transition in the months to come. And I loved posting the pic of me with the ice cream. It just felt good.

  2. Chloe, Congratulations on the weight loss this last week! I’m with you on trying to learn how to something other than “chubby.” You get so used to it. I’ve been at my weight goal for 6 months now and I still have trouble with body perception. When I go and try on new clothes I’m not used to taking the new size range to try on and keep dragging in clothes that are too big! I just can’t see myself yet as the size I am.BTW, I LOVE the picture of you with the ice cream cone!

  3. That’s fantastic Chloe!! I sppreciate your positive, but honest, reflections. I applaud you for your goals and your progress towards reaching them!! I’m also glad that blogging is helping you, because it IS also inspiring us! :)Have you noticed feeling differently on your runs?

  4. Chloe~ WOW good for you! I know it is helpful for me to blog about how I am doing. It helps me stay accountable. I love reading about how you are doing, because I know that I can do it too. At times I feel like it can be a little much for me, but reading your blog is the inspiration that I need to keep going. Thanks for sharing so much with all of us! You have helped me more than you know!

  5. chloe you are so awesome! you really are an inspiration to me (as cliche as that sounds). congrats on succeeding at your goal and especially on learning to change your way of thinking and perception of self. that seems to be the hardest part.

  6. good job!! i am at 4.8 total (for 3 weeks) and feeling pretty good. a friend i run with was slightly overweight and recently lost a bunch, and that was the first thing she commented on – how much better it was to run with less weigh bearing down on those joints!Losing the weight slowly makes it a lifestyle, not a fad.

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