I know this is such a cliche thing to say, but really, I have fantastic friends. And I wrote this great post about them and then my internet froze and I lost it…hopefully I can recapture the thoughts and feelings.

Today was a hard day. A really, really hard day. This year has been a hard year, but it kind of comes and goes. Well, today the hard came with a vengeance. And, being the religious person I am, I fully believe that there are forces working against me that want me to fail, to give up, to quit. And that’s where my friends (some of my most favorite blessings) come in.

Along with the difficulty of today came some great support. My former roommate (and present friend) emailed me about her mission call. She’s going to the Washington, D.C. North Mission, Spanish speaking. I am so excited for her. She emailed me and I had to call her just to tell her how excited I am.

Later, my sister called me at work (she ranks in the BFF category) and, even though I wasn’t able to vent my frustrations to her (for those of you who don’t me, I’m a cryer and, well, that’s just not appropriate at work–not to mention the fact that there are certain things I don’t always share with her), it was just nice to hear her voice.

And then, when the hard came pouring over me, deluge style, I picked up and flipped open my phone (such a crazy world) and called one of my dearest friends. She didn’t answer, so I left a sad, pathetic message and she called me back about 20 minutes later and I got to cry and be angry and hurt and scared and bitter and all of those things that we don’t let most people see and say things that would shock those people who never see that part of me. I felt better. My problems weren’t solved. There’s not really a solution other than time. But, in the meantime, I was functional again.

And, as I was laying down, hoping the Advil would kick in so that I could go for a nice, long run, another friend called and we were able to have a good conversation about life and its trials and blessings. And then, because I didn’t feel like my venting would be complete without the inclusion of three more friends, I was able to email them and get it all out.

I have great friends. What I have realized in my old age and maturity (okay, the reality is I’m not that old or mature) is that friendships, the ones that last, do so because they are symbiotic. I knew I could call up my friend today because I have made lots of deposits into our friendship account, and even if I did overdraft at some point (which I have on occasion), she knows I’m good for it.

Friends can’t always solve my problems (nor do I think that they should) or keep me from ever being hurt or crying, but it sure is nice to know that they are there when I need to cry, or yell, or scream, or be silly, or laugh, or just be. And, when I feel like there are so many things wrong with me, they are there to tell me to “shut right up” and move on, or that I’ll be okay, or that I’m being ridiculous…or any number of other things.

And, when I’m missing my mom (let’s face it, when you have a good relationship with your mom, even if she was a little nutty, there’s no one who can compare to her), I know that I have friends who love and support me the way that she would if she were here.

How lucky am I?!

I wish that you could all be in Utah and hang out with the friends that I get to hang out with here. They are truly fabulous. I like being an adult and having adult friends who are in similar stages of life–constant transition (IMPATIENT).

Last night, for visiting teaching, my companion and I went to dinner with the girl (yes, I will always say girl unless someone is obviously over 50–and even then it’s questionable) we visit teach (RIGHTEOUS) and her companion came with us (they visit teach my companion-CONFUSED). We went to Bombay House (JOLLY), a fabulous Indian restaurant here in Provo (SURPRISE), and we just chatted. It was so fun. That is what I think visiting teaching is supposed to be about–really becoming friends (no, I didn’t mean eating out) to the point where you really would call those women up if you needed something and it would be normal and comfortable. Next month, we’re heading to Sundance for a half-day of skiing. How fun is that (EXCITED)?!

And on to tonight, which is what really sparked this entry (THOUGHTFUL). Tonight, “Jen and the Gang” (like “Cool and the Gang” but better; this is my new term for this particular group of friends…we all know each other through Jennifer, so I think it’s appropriate-RESOLVED), came over to my house for an interactive dinner. We made pizza. We then played the game Moods. We started by following the rules, but as this is a very dramatic group of people (not in the bad way, perhaps animated would be a better way to put that-PLEASED), that proved to be a little boring. So, we modified the rule…and good times were had by all.

I could try and describe this experience to those of you who weren’t there, but it wouldn’t work. All I can tell you is that my eyes watered and my cheeks still hurt from laughing (JOYFUL!). And the best part is that this particular group of friends makes me want to be a better person. I guess a better way to put it is that they bring out the best in me (CONTENT). I know that sounds a little cheesy and cliche, but it’s true nonetheless. They are fantastic and they are all so nice. Catherine, a friend of mine (so now she knows Jen), came over a little later in the evening and she fit right in. It was fabulous (RELIEVED)! I always stress out when different groups of friends interact because I like them all, but I worry that they won’t like each other (ANXIOUS).

I wish that the good times would translate through my little blog (HOPEFUL)…but they won’t (DISAPPOINTED). Just think of the last time you were with a group of people and you all just kept laughing. Tonight was all about the adjective. And the best part is that there is no drama. I would guess that we all have our moments (or in my case, chloments :-), but never anything major. In fact, I only know about my own little moments (EMBARRASSED). It’s so easy.

I think in my “old” age (MOCKING)–I love saying that because the only thing that makes me think I’m old is the fact that I’m Mormon and single and I don’t really think I’m old)–I’m finally at a point where I can just say “no” to drama (RELAXED). I get to choose that. Do I want to always be kind to people? Ideally, yes. But do I have to be friends with everyone? No. And there’s nothing wrong with that (HONEST).

To “Jen and the gang” – here’s to more good times and chepleazy chloments full of bash!