So, I think I might have mentioned that I’ve been doing a little dating of the on-line variety. Anyway, one of these boys, “the PhD” as he will be know on the blog, is turning out to be lots of fun. And for once in my life, I’m not worried about where it’s going or even if it’s going. I’m just dating.
I know I mentioned that I was going to be making a shift back to trying to date Mormons*, but the PhD is not Mormon and I’m just fine with that because he is okay with the fact that I am. Sure, it’s led to a few very interesting and semi-awkward conversations that I won’t be sharing in any detail here. But even those conversations have been enjoyable because I’m not stressed out about whether something is going to be a deal-breaker or whatever.
Tonight he asked me why, if I am looking to get married as the end result of dating, I’m not being more selective in who I date. (He knows I’ve been dating a lot…we have oddly honest conversations about all kinds of things people don’t normally openly discuss because when you have to have those semi-awkward conversations, everything else seems kind of normal.) It’s a good question. And the best answer I’ve come up with is that I’m still trying to figure out what I want and how to be myself in the process of looking for/finding what I want, and dating–without worrying so much about the marriage factor–is helping.
So, this may be a little late in coming–like 12 years late–but I’ve decided to act like I’m 20 and just see how it goes. For right now, I’m enjoying myself. A lot.
*I was going to say “back to dating Mormons”, but let’s be honest here, it’s always just been an effort, not a reality. Something about me and Mormon boys doesn’t mix…and I’m starting to realize that I might be a big part of the problem in that combination.