new adventures

I have this sense, already, that when the next two years are over, I’m going to be very, very sad. I know that’s weird, considering I have just met these people. I just think that this is going to equal my mission in the best choices I have ever made.

I think about where I was two years ago. I had just called off my wedding. I was days away from cutting Jared off permanently, and I had no idea what my future would hold. I had hopes and dreams, but they seemed so out there. And now, here I am. In a great MBA program, already having made quite a few new friends. Not only that, but I feel like people in the program (faculty, that is) already know me and like me.

I may be totally delusional, but I kind of feel like some kind of celebrity in the program. Now, I realize that this is not going to get me jobs (I have a long way to go with the interviewing skills), but I feel like it’s going to make my experience so great. And I think it has given me the sense that I have something to live up to. Does that make sense? Like these people have such high expectations when it comes to what I’m going to do, and I don’t want to disappoint them. Not only that, but I don’t want to disappoint myself.

I have the chance to redeem myself for my undergrad. I know I’m smart, I just need to prove to myself that I’m not lazy. I know it’s weird that, after getting into such a stellar program and being given a full-tuition scholarship, I could even consider myself lazy, but some labels are hard to remove, even if I’m the only one letting it stay.

bueller?... bueller?... bueller?

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