my party and ddr

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Happy Birthday to me!!!

How cute are my friends?

Catherine (the one blowing the candle out with me) and I had a combined birthday party. I think almost everyone had a good time. The DDR pictures are coming soon. If you’re not familiar with DDR, you should be. Dance Dance Revolution is a fantastic game (activity)! I laughed so hard. I consider myself fairly coordinated (all those years of cheerleading and step-aerobics), but evidently, I am not. I’m sure with a little more practice, I can become a DDR master. I have found my new calling!!! And I thought it was going to take a few years to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. It’s just like they say, it’s when you’re not looking for it, that it comes to you (I think “they” meant romance, but…whatever).
So, to be honest, I only got on the dance pads twice (and once wasn’t in front of everyone), but I still think I could be the next American DDR Champion. Where’s my reality show??? (And no, there are no pictures of me participating…perhaps after the next party.)


This is DDR. Doesn’t it make you want to get up and dance just looking at the pictures. Now, as my quest for champion status continues, the question is, how am I going to do it without owning it? A dilemma for another day.

celebrating me and my life

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Happy Birthday to me!!! I’m officially old. It’s true. But I’m happy and healthy, less poor than I was a week ago (I started a new job-that’s my ID picture), happily not married and almost wanting to date again. I would say that this year has been a success.

I have definitely learned a lot, and I can honestly say that I am finally grateful for the trials I experienced over the last year. Hopefully this next one will not be quite so turbulent or traumatic.

My friend sent me this great email for the month of November with the subject: Attitude of Gratitude Challenge. What you are supposed to do is send out an email each day for the month of November listing three “things” for which you are grateful, except during the week of Thanksgiving, when you need to list five for each day. I haven’t been doing it (I haven’t had time or access to my Yahoo! for long enough to do it), but I thought I would make a list here to start:

1. I am grateful for a dad who let me move home when I had no where else to go.
2. I am grateful for a dad who happens to own a house with a studio apartment over the garage so I don’t feel like a complete loser.
3. I am grateful for friends who like Indian food, since no one in my family does.
4. I am grateful for nieces and nephews.
5. I am grateful for bras that fit. (For those of you who are men and not married, just trust me.)
6. I am grateful for made up words and the laughter that follows.
7. I am grateful for my healthy body.
8. I am grateful that I’m a girl and as such, new shoes really can cheer me up.
9. I am thankful that I know God exists and that He knows me personally.
10. I am thankful that I have a love of reading.
11. I am grateful for pillow-top mattresses, flannel sheets and down comforters.
12. I am thankful for my friends. Some are old, some are new, but all add value to my life and make me happy.

Now I’m caught up and can start the emails tomorrow.

And the only other thing I want to share today is this…

chepleazy

(for a definition/explanation, please go to the link “cryptic words meander”)

and there was music…

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I started voice lessons last week. It is an interesting experience just doing something for me, with no real goal in mind, but just because I enjoy it. Every little girl has dreams. My dream was to sing. My poor siblings have endured long hours of my harmonizing to any song playing on the radio. What I finally decided, once I decided not to get married, is that I have all of these dreams (not hundreds, but a few) and now is the time to live them out. I don’t imagine that I will ever be a famous vocalist nor do I plan on making a career out of it (dreams change over time), but to be able to record a CD just for me would be fantastic. So, I’m going for it. I sing my heart out in my little apartment over the garage (it has fabulous acoustics). And someday, in the relatively near future, I will record my first song. Over time, I hope to record a few.

The perfectionist in me struggles because I am not that good and I have to sing for this woman who is so very talented. I have to make funny noises and faces all in an effort to improve. I spent almost half the first lesson just laughing at myself. It feels good. It feels good to do something that takes work. It feels good to be courageous and know that I have a long, long way to go. It feels good to want something just for me, not to make me popular, not to make me successful, not to make me loved, but just for me.

So here’s my advice for the week…figure out what your dreams are and start living them. It is so worth the effort.

life lessons

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Life is truly interesting. There are so many lessons to be learned. As I watched one of my dearest friends, Bobbi, marry her sweetheart this week, I felt so many different emotions. I was so happy for her. She deserves someone like Mark. I was so happy that I wasn’t the one getting married (thank goodness). But most of all, I felt hope. Hope for my future. Hope for Bobbi’s future. Hope for the life I have ahead of me.

One of the greatest lessons I am learning now is that God really is in control of our lives, or at least He can be if we allow Him to be. Life happens so fast and there are so many decisions to make every day. I am at a crossroads. I don’t know what the future holds. I have been trying so hard to figure it out; what I’m supposed to do, where I’m supposed to be, etc. The conclusion I finally came to is that I am on this ride, but God is the one driving the car. I don’t have to know what the future holds. I just need to trust God and keep on moving.

mistakes

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It’s sometimes easy to look at our past and ask “Why me?” For those of us who had the opportunity to hear Elder Wirthlin speak this Sunday, the question we should always ask is, “What next?” So, what’s next for me after the last eight months of mistakes…moving forward. I am learning from the mistakes I made and going on to live a better life. I am free. I have my whole life in front of me and I can choose to make it exactly what I want it to be.

I have so many dreams. I want to travel and see the world, not that I haven’t, but I want to see more. I want to go back to school to prove to myself that I can get through a master’s program with good grades and find a great job where I feel challenged and successful regularly. I want to learn to play an instrument. I want to SCUBA in the Galapagos and hike Mt. Kilimanjaro. Most importantly, I want to do what God wants me to do and become what He sees me becoming. What and who that is, I am discovering a little piece at a time.

What I love is that I’m done asking “Why me?” and “How could I have been so (fill in any negative adjective you like)?” and I am moving forward with, “What now?” Yes, I have made mistakes. We have all made mistakes. I am choosing to move on.