Side note: it’s always bothered me when people say “one month anniversary” or whatever other than year because anniversary implies “year”. So instead, I made up a word. Yeah…I make no sense I know.
Moving on. As of today, I have been in Tokyo for an entire month. Yes. An entire month! How did that happen? Seriously.
Anyway, I felt like I needed to post something in celebration, so I’m going to post photos and a little video from Saturday. No food (gross or otherwise). Just some photos from my visit to Meiji Jingu Shrine and park on Saturday. Since I already posted about the things that have surprised me, there’s not a lot to add as a “wow, it’s been a month” post…so, just enjoy the photos and very short video.
Random dance festival we came across
Couldn’t resist capturing these dancers posing
Meiji Jingu Shrine gate
This is where you wash your hands before entering the actual shrine.
You scoop the water out with the wooden ladles. Such a beautiful ritual.
I was loving the sunlight.
My Tokyo version of Poets’ Walk in Central Park.
And just in case you’re curious about where I work, this is the lobby. I kind of love it!
So, I have always been one who believes in trying everything at least once (well, when it comes to food). I don’t like everything I’ve ever tried, but I am willing to try it. Yesterday tested my commitment to this belief. Maybe not more than ever (the caterpillar on my mission was by far the craziest thing I’ve ever tried), but it was quite the adventure.
I decided that I would head down to the Tsukiji Fish Market yesterday morning. The goal was to get down there in time for the auction that happens at the butt crack of dawn…but that didn’t happen. So I headed down a little later to see it (get the lay of the land for when I do have the motivation to get up at 3:30 am to head down) and to get some of the freshest sushi in the world.
This is a long row of restaurants next to the actual market. The ones with sushi have lines. The others, not so much.
I waited in line a LONG time for this sushi, so I was hoping it was going to be worth it. And worth it, it was! Seriously, the sushi was amazing. So delicious. That said, when I was still in line (staring in the window) I saw one of the sushi chefs put this piece of nigiri in front of a customer and it moved. Yes, it MOVED. I knew I was going to eat it because, well, that’s just what I do. But I was kind of nervous about it.
All of those umbrellas? People in line for one of the sushi places. My line looked about the same. Totally worth it!
The itty-bitty sushi place where I ate. This is where I first saw the clam. Notice that it’s so small, there’s a shelf above divers’ heads for their bags. Even tighter than in NY
Anyway, I finally got seated and waited with anticipation for the piece of super fresh clam. However, before we got to that, I had a piece of sea urchin. Let me tell you, if you are going to venture into sushi for the first time (or you’re a “California Roll” type), DO NOT get sea urchin. The flavor is fine, but the texture? So nasty. And this coming from the girl who has eaten a caterpillar.
So, after I got through the sea urchin, I was just waiting for the clam. Everything else was delicious, but I was slightly preoccupied with thoughts of the clam. Oh, and being told when I could and couldn’t use soy sauce. These sushi chefs? Super nice, but very serious about their sushi. And then the clam came. Unfortunately, I didn’t have my iPhone ready to go for the video, even though I’d been thinking about it constantly since I’d seen it. Fortunately, it was so good that I felt just fine about ordering a second piece. Amazing! (Watch the lower left side of the piece…you may have to watch a couple of times to catch it.)
But the really adventurous eating came later, at the yakitori place my friend (yes, I have some friends!!!) and I went to for dinner. Yakitori, for those who don’t know, is a kind of Japanese bbq (small little skewers of assorted meats and vegetables). It’s fairly straight forward. There are some adventurous types of fish and parts of chicken you can order, but everything is cooked (and seriously delicious). Note to self: when you think something’s safe, think again.
So, when this little bowl was put in front of me full, you can understand why I was slightly shocked (and nervous) about trying it:
Fish heads, fish heads…
Yeah…so all those little silver/black specks. Eyes. Eyes on little fish. Eyes staring at me. They kind of look more like worms with eyes to me. Somehow I stomached it (the flavor was fine–once I poured some soy sauce on it–and underneath was a big things of very mild, shredded daikon), but I don’t know that I will be doing that one again. Seriously, it was a little much. Even for me. In fact, looking at this picture kind of makes me feel uncomfortable.
I’m not sure how much more adventurous I will be able to get. Not that there aren’t more things to try, but seriously, I feel like I’ve reached my limit.
For those of you with more normal palettes, please know that there is a lot of really good, very normal food in Japan. You do not (I repeat, Rae, do not) have to be an adventurous eater to enjoy Japan. Like tonight, I’m going to my friend’s apartment (yes, that’s TWO! friends) for dinner and we’re having tankatsu (delicious, breaded pork…only she’s making chicken) and rice. Very basic. Very good.
The view from my office. (Please excuse the reflection in the clouds. I’ll edit that out eventually.)
I got an email this morning from a friend asking me, now that I’ve been here three weeks, what has surprised me the most. Well, I thought it sounded like a good blog post, so here we go. Not much has surprised me, to be perfectly honest. I feel like I was pretty well prepared. I read a lot, talked to people who had lived in Japan, and did quite a bit of internet research. I knew the toilets would be something to behold. I knew I’d feel like some sort of Amazon woman. I knew, despite what I had been told, that it would frustrate me to know end to not be able to speak/read/understand Japanese. And I was fully prepared to be homesick. Probably overly prepared.
Those of you who know me know that I am a firm believer in managing expectations. I would always rather expect less and get more than be disappointed. I like being pleasantly surprised. And so, that’s exactly what I did in preparing for Japan. I managed my own expectations. I know, I know, you’re ready for me to get to the point. So, here we go…
I have been surprised by how not huge I feel. Which is really quite shocking when you consider just how petite and thin every Japanese woman is (and I mean EVERY SINGLE ONE) and I’m taller side for a girl even by US standards. I have thought a lot about this and I have a few hypotheses. First, I stick out so ridiculously anyway that there’s no way to even begin to compare myself. Second, I have no idea whether or not these women (or men, for that matter) even care about being thin. Third, one of the beautiful things about NOT being able to understand Japanese is that most of the woman I sit by at work everyday are Japanese and the non-work conversations occur mostly in Japanese. So, unlike in the US where I can overhear comments about what so-and-so should or shouldn’t have eaten, or how much weight such-and-such has gained or needs to lose, here I have no idea whether those conversations even happen. Based on what I see my coworkers eat, they do not. I wish I knew what their secret was, but the fact is, and this is surprise number two…
Japanese women can EAT. Maybe they just eat in public and then eat nothing once they get home, but whenever I’m with them.
How nice it has been to not have a social life. I knew when I left New York that I needed a break. Don’t get me wrong. I adore my friends and I have amazing ones. It wasn’t my friends that were the problem. It was my overcommitment to stuff. Soccer, kickball, classes, dinners, game nights, etc, etc, etc. I’d quit working out. I wasn’t getting enough sleep. It was just go, go, go, go, go. I hit a point, after two weeks here, when I decided I needed to make some friends, but I also decided I’m going to try and stick to to “weekend socializing” which is convenient since most of my potential new expat friends are married with children.
How happy I would be that I only watch a few tv-shows religiously in my normal life. In Japan, on the cable available to me, there are two channels that show prime-time American television with an option to listen in English and guess what is showing. Grey’s Anatomy, Castle, Awake and they are awesome shows. Who knew? (Okay, well everyone knew Grey’s was good…I was just a little late to the party.
How sad I would be to miss the Olympics. I mean, I knew I’d miss them, but it was slightly heartbreaking. And not having a DVR to capture the stuff I wanted to see (or even knowing if I could…there was a lot of table tennis and judo being shown ’round these parts…).
That the first (and only) time I’ve cried since I got here was due to PMS and someone reminding me just how very single I am. (Normally, this wouldn’t make me cry, but it was a Sunday and, as stated previously, I was a little PMSy–apologies to those who didn’t want to know that much about me.) That said, given the circumstances, I probably would have cried whether I was in Japan or New York or Arizona. I really expected that the first time I would have cried it would have been because I was homesick or frustrated or something much more traumatic (and acceptable, in my view…sure I’m single, but my life is pretty freaking awesome). But no. And I don’t want my family to thing that this is because I don’t love and miss them. It’s just that technology has made it so easy to stay connected to them that it doesn’t feel much different than if I were still living in New York.
How little I miss American food (or American utensils)…with the exception of Diet Coke. Truth be told, Asian foods (which, I realize, covers a lot of different countries and food types) are by far my favorites, so I suppose it shouldn’t have surprised me. But not being able to even access Diet Coke. You’d think someone had taken air away from me. And it’s not that I can’t live without it. I can. I go through phases, some that have lasted as long six months, of not drinking it. But to not even have the option. To not be the one in control. That is killing me.
How awful sitting down on a “warm” toilet seat really is. And we’re not talking warm like “someone was just sitting on it warm” because that, while unpleasant is not awful. We’re talking like “warm” you lift your bum right off of it because it’s so “warm” and awful.
How much sleep I would need. I am seriously exhausted at the end of everyday. Between work, and working out, and trying to communicate to get everyday stuff done, all I want to do what I get home is go to bed.
How funny the Japanese are. And I don’t mean funny like “weird” or “quirky”. I mean, literally, funny. And they love to laugh! And they are so warm and kind, if a little shy at first.
How much of a stretch my job would be. I don’t really like talking about work here (I don’t think it’s especially prudent), but I’ll just say that it’s been much harder than I was expecting. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Hard means progress as I figure it out, but the learning part isn’t my favorite.
How nervous (and I shy) I get when trying to speak Japanese. It seriously is like I become this person I don’t even know. It’s weird and uncomfortable and so, the sooner I learn enough to feel confident in at least ordering at a restaurant, the happier I will be.
Just how awesome Japanese bathrooms and self-filling, deep bathtubs are. I don’t know how I’m going to survive without them when I get back to the US.
How easily I would get used to the (almost daily) earthquakes. They’re just little, but for some reason, they are much less alarming than I had anticipated. And Japan is much better prepared for a serious earthquake than California could ever hope to be.
How much I really do love it here. Part of that might be knowing that this isn’t forever, but with any luck, it will be longer than six months. (Family and friends, you are all welcome to come visit!)
How long it would take me to feel geographically oriented and how irritating it would be to not have a clear sense of direction. (I miss my grids!)
And the final (and possibly most surprising surprise) thing is how much I don’t miss all of my stuff. Now, I’m guessing this will change as I make more friends and want to do more things, but for now, I’m fine. That said, I do have my music and my pictures, and technology…and apparently that’s all I need in terms of material things.
So, there’s the list. I suppose it seems like a lot, but when I think about all of the things that might have surprised me, it doesn’t feel that long. And yes, the picture has nothing to do with the post, but what’s a post without a picture?
Somehow, I made it through week three with my dignity intact. And I made some friends! I wanted to blog more, but as it were, I am here because of work and work has been very busy. I have also found that by the time I get home at night, I am EXHAUSTED. I actually started wondering this week if maybe I was sick, but then it occurred to me that living and working in a foreign country is, in and of itself, exhausting. So, yesterday when I didn’t leave my apartment until 3:00, I cut myself a little slack (plus I did work out).
So, here are the events from last week worth noting:
1. I moved into a new apartment and it is DREAMY! I was in a nice apartment before, but as previously stated, my lovely international assignment consultant and my lovely mobility colleague got me into a bigger apartment. I’m on the 11th floor and have a pretty awesome view. Oh, and don’t worry, it’s like 100 sq feet bigger than my apartment was in NY. Like I said, DREAMY!
The moving part was not so dreamy, but it could have been worse…and well worth it for the dreaminess.
I have a couch and a table. And between the couch and my bed, there’s a partition I can pull across if I have people over.
A dreary day, but what a difference seven floors can make.
My view at 7 am. Oh, sunlight! How I’ve missed you! Both while living in the cute cave (no hating–it was a great apartment) and since moving here in the rainy season.
Okay, there is on negative. I found out I live right next to this cemetery. Small price…
2. I went up to the top of Tokyo Tower to see the city and watch some fireworks. For those of you who don’t know this, I was a geography major undergrad. I love geography; physical, spatial, social, any kind really. But part of that love causes problems for me. If I don’t have a good handle on my surroundings, I feel completely and totally discombobulated. So, going to the top of TT was not just for tourist purposes or fireworks observation. It was to help me wrap my head around this city. I think it helped and hurt. This place is HUGE!
Fireworks are a big thing here in Japan. It seems there’s a fireworks display somewhere every weekend during the summer. And these were pretty impressive. Because I was already at the top of the tower, I decided to just hang out there and wait rather than attempt to go watch them down by the bay. It was crazy how long some people waited there. And then, when they started, there was a fight that broke out. Not fists or anything, but the old woman was yelling about something and a guy in the front of the crowd (we were all trying to watch out of the east facing window) was yelling back at her. It was a lot of emotion in a very small place.
That finally passed and we all enjoyed the fireworks. One of the advantages of being a relatively tall woman in the US is that I am really tall here, so I was able to easily see over everyone and get some good photos, too.
Rainbow Bridge
Amazing…the blue line in the background? A bridge on the other side of Tokyo Bay.
A shot of Tokyo Tower at night. Beautiful!
And I discovered a Baskin-Robbins at the bottom with super yummy mango-passionfruit sherbet and Pop-Rock ice cream.
3. I made some friends at church and at work!!! The first couple of weeks I was here, being friendless was fine. Work really is busy during the week and it’s been nice to remember a life that doesn’t involve some sort of socializing every single night. I am getting sleep and exercising (which is a dang good thing considering all the amazing food I’ve been consuming), but then last Friday, I realized friends on the weekend would be nice.
So, this past week at work, I invited a couple of coworkers to lunch on different days and got to know them. They are both darling. What I’ve been told (and am experiencing) about the Japanese is that they are somewhat shy when it comes to inviting foreigners to do things, but once invited, they are all about inclusion. I have now been invited to one of their homes for New Years (which is a big family holiday here). And she also invited me to hangout with her and her fiance on the weekends as they live near me and are kind of mellow on the weekends. I will probably have to make sure she knows I really want to do it, but that’s totally fine. I’m just excited to have some people with whom to do stuff! The other great thing about having Japanese friends is that they can introduce me to all kinds of fun things and help me with my attempts at Japanese.
With one coworker, we went to a Chinese place where there was a Chinese Tea Master. I had no idea such a thing existed, but it was kind of amazing. And the tea was so good.
With my other coworker, I had Tonkatsu. This absolutely divine fried pork (panko is the way to go for breading).
Additionally, at church last Sunday, I stepped WAY outside of my comfort zone and basically went up to this girl and told her she had a cute baby (yes, I’ve hit the age where that’s my pickup line for making new friends at church–judge away–but seriously, her baby is darling and she seemed like she’d be a fun friend). As it turns out, my instincts were correct and my new friend, Holly, organized a little girls’ night out for me and a few other ladies at church. The location? TGI Friday’s right near my apartment. It was my first American meal since I arrived three weeks ago. It was so much fun.
My kind of ladies…lots of appetizers including table-side guacamole!
One of the other really fun things about these new girlfriends from church is that one reminds me totally of my sis-in-law, Shelley and it makes me feel like I have a little piece of home. After dinner, she took us on a little tour of the city (she had to drop off snowboards to her teenage sons at their friends’ apartment because they were going to this indoor snowboarding place the next day…Japan does not mess around). Anyway, as part of this tour, we went through this crazy ward called Shibuya. It is home of the busiest intersection in the world. It was quite a fun little spin around town.
4. I decided I needed to just have a “normal” Saturday as opposed to an “I’m a foreigner living in Tokyo” Saturday. I slept in (which is no small miracle), talked to my cousin on the phone while working out on the treadmill, and headed to a spa for a pedicure. I happened upon this little store along the way. (I stopped inside and got a couple of pieces for a LARGE fortune.)
One of the things that is so interesting about Tokyo (like New York) is how hidden many of the businesses are. But in Tokyo, it’s even more that way because there are so many narrow, little, winding streets (alleys, really) throughout the city. I found this place online (I’ve learned to search for products and that usually serves me well). The place was super cute and clean, and had America gossip rags. 🙂 It was not the same as my happy place in NYC (no massaging chairs or gel baths), but the girls did a great job and it was super relaxing.
After that, I just walked for a long time, working my way slowly down to Shibuya so I could take some pics of the intersection (okay, I had to do some touristing). It was so quiet and lovely and amazing when I happened upon a crazy street in the heart of Harajuku. That’s the crazy part of Tokyo. You can be walking along on a totally quiet, almost suburban street, turn the corner, and you are in the heart of craziness. No transition. No warning. Just BOOM! In your face.
One of my favorite things about Tokyo (from a practicality standpoint) is the abundance of vending machines. Even down a small side alley, you will find vending machines. It’s so great.
This is the size of most side streets in Tokyo. There are some big, main roads, but the side streets are all mostly itty-bitty.
I just took this to illustrate how tight parking is some places. Serious skill (and cajones) to park this thing here.
Some sort of ginormous fish(?) carcass. Outside a restaurant. Not exactly what would make me want to go inside.
Once I made it to Shibuya, I went up in the second floor of a Starbucks and watched the foot traffic. It was not a super busy night, and even so, it was kind of incredible. I did not take the video below (although I did take one), but it shows the intersection and how crazy it is…and that happens every 3-5 minutes depending on the light cycle.
I did take some pictures, though, so you can see what I saw.
5. As part of my “normal” Saturday, I decided to go to a movie. This was a big deal because movies here are NOT cheap….like “$28 for a ticket to see Avengers in 3D (no other option)” not cheap. But I hadn’t seen it yet and I just wanted to go not think for a while…and see what it was like to see a movie in Japan. Turns out, it’s expensive, but it’s pretty awesome; reserved seats, regular AND caramel popcorn, these awesome little trays that sit in the cup holders. The only downside…people apparently think it’s perfectly acceptable to remove your shoes once seated in the theater. And at the end of a day in the summer, I can assure you that was not pleasant. But I got over it.
And that is my week in a very big nutshell. Pretty much, Tokyo is still awesome and I’m still loving it!
Perhaps I need to rename this blog Ways I am Making of Fool of Myself in Japan. But, then again, the current title seems pretty appropriate, for every day seems to present a new existential dilemma for me…or, in some cases, an existential crisis. Okay, maybe that’s a little dramatic. But only a little. Now, onto the actual post.
Friday night I was wandering around my neighborhood looking for a new restaurant to try. This is both an exciting adventure and a painful task that I get to experience every night. I so wish I spoke Japanese! And I would eat at home, but why when there’s so much good food out there that someone else has prepared and dishes that someone else will do?
Anyway, back to the story. I saw this amazing looking oyster bar, but all the tables were reserved and I did not want to sit at the bar because it was also the smoking section and, while I tolerate cigarette smoke just fine when necessary, I don’t really like it with my food. (I will be going back there sometime this week because, seriously, it looked incredible.)
So, I kept wandering and found myself down a little side street (which is most streets in Tokyo) and wandered past a restaurant with all of these lovely wind chimes tinkling in the evening breeze. I kept walking past because it was a sukiyaki/shabu shabu place, meaning it was both pricey and going to be way too much food for just me. (Don’t worry, I am making friends slowly, but I’ve actually been thoroughly enjoying my quiet life these past two weeks.)
After wandering down the street a little farther, I realized that the wind chimes were calling to me (wind chimes always remind me of my brother’s house, so that was probably part of it) and there was a waiter/host outside of the restaurant who just looked so very friendly. I headed back and followed the nice man down the stairs (everything is vertical in Tokyo, so it’s not uncommon to eat in the basement or on the 9th floor) and inside…where it was obvious that I was going to be asked to remove my shoes. I did so and then followed the host/server past a section of perfectly good, empty, western style tables to the back, where there were other diners and, yes, Japanese style table (i.e. floor level seating). Thankfully, it was not “sit cross-legged” floor seating (there was a lowered part for my feet/legs) because no one wants to think about what a disaster that might have been with my current dribbling issues. But still, is there a graceful way to sit on the floor in a restaurant?
Once seated, I looked over the menu and decided to just get the sukiyaki (way to much food for one person), which came with a little appetizer, clear soup, sashimi, tempura, sukiyaki, and a little dessert. (Since moving here and dining alone most nights, I’ve learned to just be okay not finishing all my food even though doggy bags are not a feasible option most of the time.) The appetizers were just little vegetable dishes. The sashimi was pretty straightforward, minus the full shrimp (eyeballs and all) that stared at me. Apparently you are supposed to suck out the insides of the head. I am an adventurous eater, but even I have limits. Although you will see that they are pretty low. Then came the clear soup with, I kid you not, half a fish in it–fins and all.
See the shrimp eyes?
See the fins?
So, at this point, I was very much looking forward to the tempura because that is always very straightforward. And the tempura came and there were no surprises. The waitress proceeded to prepare my sukiyaki (the pot is brought to the table and cooked right there on a little portable, gas range thing) and I decided to dig in to my tempura. I saw this little round blob sitting on on the paper. I wasn’t sure what it was (mushroom, maybe?), but I saw what was clearly tempura breading on it, so I pick it up and plop it in my mouth.
Sukiyaki, pre-cooking.
Well, that tempura I saw on it was just a little flake. I had just put a large blob of grated daikon (an Asian radish) into my mouth. And while nowhere near as hot as horseradish or wasabi, it still has a little kick to it and the last think I wanted to do was swallow this whole thing. Not only that, but having had tempura one other time since living here, I knew the daikon was meant for the tempura sauce…and I wanted it in the sauce!
See? Existential crisis.
I would love to tell you that I decided to be the upstanding, appropriate, polite, well-mannered individual that my mother and grandmother raised me to be. I would love to tell you that I just sucked it up and swallowed it. I would love to tell you that those ridiculous scenes in movies where people do ridiculous things like hold food in their mouths until they can spit it out without anyone noticing are just that: completely ridiculous and totally unrealistic. I would love to say all of these things right now, but I cannot.
There I sat while this waitress took, what felt like, five years to get the sukiyaki going with a huge blob of daikon in my not-so-very-large mouth. She’d look at me every so often (probably wondering why I wasn’t touching the oh-so-delicious tempura sitting in front of me) and I’d smile to the best of my ability with my mouth full of radish. Finally, she walked away. I glanced around at the two other occupied tables and made sure no one was looking at me. And then I did what you are all hoping and praying I didn’t do (only secretly happy I did because it’s going to give you a good laugh); I lifted the little sauce bowl to my mouth and spit the daikon into it. This might be a new low.
There’s a great quote by American author H. Jackson Browne, Jr. (I had no idea who he was until I looked for this quote) that states, “Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking.” Clearly, I have some character issues. I can happily state that had anyone been with me, I would have just swallowed the daikon. There’s just something about the anonymity of living in a very foreign country where I can barely communicate with anyone that affords me the freedom to be completely ridiculous. Which, as most of you know, is not my normal state of being when I am in my normal life. And while I probably need to get back to that place because this is my normal life now, there’s something so liberating about just not caring. (I think my therapist would be proud?)
Okay, back to the rest of the meal. For the most part, it proceeded without any more ridiculousness. The only part that was a little iffy was when the nice waiter brought me a raw egg in a bowl (to accompany the sukiyaki, as I learned) and I had absolutely no idea what to do with it. I communicated as much to him using very basic English and a lot of sign language (well, ridiculous hand gestures…it would be offensive to the deaf community to call anything I was doing “sign language”). Somehow, he understood what I was asking and showed me that the egg was meant for me to mix up and then dip my beef and vegetables in it–as in dip them and then put them directly into my mouth.
Since I was now in a state of complete ridiculousness given the daikon incident, I decided to just go for it. I am so thankful that a) I am pretty comfortable with weird foods and b) I have a stomach that can handle a lot. Plus, with all the cookie dough and brownie batter I’ve consumed over the years, I figured I was pretty safe with a little more raw egg. Although, had this been any country other than Japan, I probably wouldn’t have done it, but considering their high standards for quality, I figured I was okay. (Last night is was seared chicken–as in mostly raw–in my salad. I had already taken a few bites before I realized what it was, so I just kept going. One of these days my luck is going to run out, but for now, apparently I’m okay.)
And finally, there was dessert; vanilla ice cream and some sort of jelly something (consistency somewhere between jello and gummies). I have no idea what the flavor was, but it was delicious.
And with that, I paid my bill and stood up as gracefully as possible (which is to say not very gracefully at all) and headed home…laughing to myself the whole way. If nothing else, my time in Japan will be full of very entertaining memories.
existential dilemmas 