I know that I have treated you well over the years, ever since Shelley made us get that first pedicure when I was 14, but it’s over. I mean, I’m going to do my best, but I’m not nail tech. Don’t expect any great foot massages, or lavish soaks; the dead skin will get filed, and the toenails will get painted, but that’s all I can promise. I’m sorry to do this to you. Really and truly. You have no idea how painful it is to really not be able to afford a pedicure.
The girl who promises that, provided she gets a paid internship next summer, you will get at least one pedicure next year
Dear boys who don’t wear their wedding rings,
You really bug me. I mean, you belong to someone. Don’t you want people to know that. I’m sure your wives would like people to know that as your out and about having a grand ol’ time while they are at home, alone, raising your children.
Don’t get the wrong idea. I’m not “checking you out”. Dating someone in the program would be a bad idea, but really, just where your ring. Seriously.
The girl who hopes that, should she ever get married, her husband would always want to wear his ring
You are my new best friend. You are amazing. All of the applications I’ve been able to download to make my life easier. My favorite of the week? The grocery list. Talk about being helpful in times of budgeting (okay, for someone who just learned what the word means). It was a little painful to realize how much some of my favorite things cost and that they aren’t in the budget right now, but playing with you took the sting off.
With much love and gratitude,
Dear restaurants of Utah County,
I must bid you a fond farewell. I mean, I love you, really and truly, but the nasty b-word (budget) has informed me that you don’t get to be a part of my life for the next two years. This is a new thing for me. Neither me nor my sisters have figured out how to live without you, even though we can all cook.
Oh, and don’t be offended that you aren’t seeing Sarah, Candice, Emily, or Kelly either. I didn’t make them stop because I can’t go, they all just moved away and left me here by my lonesome. I promise to visit sometime (when my dad takes me out for my birthday).
With much sadness (but hope of being both less poor and less fat),
Dear Igloo lunch box,
Thank you for being both cute and functional. While I don’t love that I will be making my own lunch these days, you are making it much less terrible. I’m excited to try you out tomorrow, even if I’m not so excited about eating a lunch that I made (it’s never as good as when someone else makes it).
The girl who wants everyone to know that it’s my dad’s fault that I eat out so much, she swears
And on that note, it’s time for me to make my lunch so I’m all ready to go in the morning.